The shish to my kebab. The Sonny to my Cher. Like can you please pass the salt. And the chocolate. I’m alllll about the no-bake snacks lately because in case you haven’t noticed, us Columbusians live in a rainforest. A wet, humid rainforest filled with monkeys and toucans. When you live in an eighty-eight degree jungle, you don’t turn the oven on. You turn the food processor on.

I feel like a lot of people don’t have big food proccesors. You all need to get one. It’s probably my most loved kitchen appliance next to my Nutribullet. I use it for everything from making black bean brownies, protein bars and veggie burgers to grinding oats into oat flour. It’s a godsend. While it isn’t that cheap, it isn’t that expensive either. Plus, they’re on sale at Macy’s like every other day so hashtag treatyoself. You’ll save money on your electric bill too, since you’ll be blending more and oven-ing less. Trust me.

Speaking of salty, I’m a liiiiiiiittle salty that I got a flat tire on Monday. I’m also salty that my iPhone got stolen out of my purse at the bar on Saturday night. It’s insane how naked and lost I feel without my phone. No Instagram?! Is this even real life??  It only seems appropriate that we celebrate my saltiness and recent terrible luck with salted chocolate chia bars, no? In other news, “Talk Dirty” just came on my Today’s Hits pandora. Can I just say that it makes me a wee bit uncomfy when the girls I babysit belt out this song in the backseat? “I don’t like the words, just the beat.” Right, and your booty don’t need explaining. I mean I feel awkward  listening to this song right now and I’m alone. I’d most definitely talk dirty to these bars, though. Print  

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