Well kale makes me feel healthier. Like gimme dat bagel and cream cheese with a kale leaf on top and let’s call it a day. The days of kale being a mere garnish are long gone, my friends. Have you not seen kale caesar salads on every menu EVER lately? They’re so rustic and modern and worldly. I mean everyone’s doing it. Caesar dressing is totally calorie-free when it’s massaged into kale leaves, no?
Kale is taking over the world, whether you like it or not. Sometimes I forget what it’s like to be in the real world where people eat donuts and frappucinos for breakfast and I’m the weirdo chugging a fugly green dirt smoothie that secretly tastes amazing. I forget that fried chicken sandwiches with chips and a pop are often the norm and hugh jass kale salads are not. It’s like I live in this microcosm of hashtag vegan healthiness. Is that a bad thing? I think not. And I must say, when I see kale caesar salads and whole wheat pizzas on restaurant menus, I feel the two worlds colliding. I get all warm and fuzzy on the inside. I don’t hate it. I don’t hate it one bit.
Did Graeter’s not just create a lower-sugar ice cream? Is Coke not introducing a cola partly sweetened with stevia? Maybe it’s just trendy. Maybe it’s just lucrative. Maybe these companies don’t actually care about diabetes and cancer at all. Well I don’t really care why they do it. I’m just happy that they are.
Maybe you eat kale because it’s cool. Maybe you eat kale because it has a nutrient density of a bajillion. Maybe you eat kale because you actually like how it tastes. <–doubt it. Whatever your reasoning, I salute your effort to eat kale now and prevent chronic disease later. Your destiny is LITERALLY in this salad. All hail the kale! Print
